The End of My BLog... :(

My Blog ends here now ... damn its so hard to let go of the only treasure that I have ...

Anyone who reads this would eventually know who the real me is.. although its true that the stuffs before 2005 was not here still this is how i get along with life.. ang drama ko noh.

Why should I end my Blog?

Well its because Ive been thinking from the time na binasa ko talaga siya... na iba rin pala ako makwela nakakatuwa.. sobrang senti na kahit papano di nag tatanim ng galit.. ngaun di ko lam kung magatatanim ako ng galit.. I'll just continue and move on....sana di ko na lang binasa sabi ko ibang tao lang mag babasa nito eh ... at di ako.. anyway kahit papano I got to know the real me... exam namin ngaun ahehe.. tapos ayun balak ko mag people suport pero aral pa rin ako .. yun nga lang sa UB na kasi kahit masakit sa loub ko ...tuloy ko na lang ..

I'm going to keep my Blog open now for people to read .. I don't care if they laugh about my wrong spellings or grammar.. I never edit my blog .. I write down what I feel that day and publish it... my mga kinopya man akong blog articles sa ibang blog... eh wala lang trip ko lang din...aheheh .. To my GG tuloy parin ,,, no matter what people would say.. she knows everything about me na... and It was really hard for me to tell those things masecreto man ako I make sure pa rin na sinasabi ko sa mga close friends ko... my mom always tell me to have friends that I should trust .. sila cris at melai un and I tell them everything... I cry over

small things hehe ako lang talaga yun ...

Ang hirap pakwalan itong blog ko ito sobra... naiiyak talaga ako .. iniisip ko nga lang kagabi eh naiiyak na ko.. pero di bale na .. bahala na.. I'll keep this open na diba.. bahala na yung makabasa okay lang sa kin.. masaktan na ang masaktan ... at least kahit papano alam nila .. pero I love them all kahit ganun ahehhe...

sige na alis na ko review na ko...

BYE TILL THEN

SHALLOW

To shallow..
To shallow..


But shallowness could still drown you It's just simple If you just walk.. But if you tip over and try not to get back on your feet fast It will eat you..


See my greatest fear is if its dark although its shallow Since you get scared, you get stuck and then you feel like drowning.

I have you.. and you let the light shine on me Sometimes I wish that it would shine more brighter Because I feel like it blinks once in a while

And then I remember I still have myself and I have to get up while i'm savouring each moment that I see your light.

cute ba .. la lang ..... kun makarelate ka di okay.

hehe.. hindi nagrhyme... bad trip na lng talaga .. kainis ang mga tao.. di na nga nag papaapekto kasi kababawan leche madali lang aminin kung true yun eh .. eh di naman.. hayyy nagiging big deal tuloy ...

Oh by the way kahapon pala nag exam kami ng property.. Mag UUb na ko next semester.. masama man sa luob ko pero okay na rin para kasama ko siya.. eh wala naman daw sa school eh ... nasa passion lang talaga.. try ko kaya mag top dun aheheh.. baka mag pamisa mami ko sa lahat ng simbahan pag nangyari yun.. speaking of my mom.. hayy miss ko na sila.. dibale after exam babawi ako sa family ko... sa sarili ko at sa GG ko .. uhmmmp sa friends?? tignan natin check ko kung may time pa .. joke.. eh puro busy na lahat ng kaibigan ko si Donna lang talaga inaalala ko .. she used to be different she never drinks since nag ka anak na siya.. kainis na joel yan sabi na nga ba malas sha eh.. hehe I remember I sent him a message simula nun nalaman ko ginwa niya kay donna ... sabi ko "PANGET" .. kasi totoo naman .. na takot pa si mel kasi YM niya so I told him.. "SI Aice 2" .. and I never talk to him that way.. formal kami mag usap nun eh joke.. di ko siya kinakausap gaano for short una pa lang ayoko na kay Donna yun eh .. kainis kasi naman dun pa eh mas okay na si mike at Gomer sa kanya kahit ayoko kasma si Gomer nun kasi hehe... di ko feel itsura nya.. bad ko nuon.. pero bago na ko ngayon..


Joanne and I are okay naman ayun nahanap na niya blog ko.. and yesterday was the first time I actually read almost everything in my blog.. ganda pala kahit papano I learned na masayahin din pala akong tao kahit papano.. I just hate some of my friends now.. because they don't look at me the way they used to see me.. I never changed .. just because of a rumor that's not true.. they see me different.. after my last break-up na sobrang heartbroken ako I tried my best to live on my own kasi ayoko na .. the truth is ayoko magaya sa mga kamag anak kong.. na babaliw aheheh dahil sa love.. dami ko pa gusto gawin sa buhay ko noh pwede ba.. nag papaligaw pero as much as possible i try my best na patagalin ang panliligaw nila naks para makita ko kung okay nga sila.. eh nawawala naman nag gigive up.. tsk yabang..malamng na T.T.O. ata (malay) hehe.. pero nahuhulog din ako aaminin ko pero i never show it kasi i know i could get over that after a month or 3 months... hehe...

I hate this site coz some of my posts are not here I make sure I enter details about whats going on with my life at least every month yun na yung least.. kainis talga.. I've been trying to find the post I enetered about paulie.. so I could read and remember what kind of feeling I used to have back then .. baka andito lang.. di ko lang mahanap.. magulo lang.. makikita ko rin yun.. kaya lang kasi as much as possible ayoko na basahin blog ko.. gusto ko ipasa na lng pag kailangan ipabasa...

There's this book I once read about Anne Frank I remember she said in her Diary that they will be choosing the best diary to be read by the people after the war. She kinda hoped that it would be her diary and eventually her diary was published. Well as for my diary I want it published din pag na dedsu na ko.. impossible nga lang ..

Melai quit her job and cris finally has her own "secret business" .. Mag tutubig hehe.. I'm so happy for her. But sometimes I miss hanging out with the old her laid back lang tapos .. we talk about stuffs that we should do. She really good when it comes to business, honestly I got surprised and shes doing a good job as well. Except sa part na lagi silang away ng away ni Rob.


I really hate caloi.. I hate her grabe nainis na talaga ako at punong puno na sakanya.. leche siya.. no wonder few na lang friends niya.. tapos babwasan pa niya kaibigan ko kainis tlga .. kainis sobra.

I told Joanne not to read my blog anymore not unless I ask her to.. and i trust her on that.. sana naman di niya mabasa ito.. I know my life may be full of negativity pero she's the only person na nag parelize sa kin na kung panu dapat gawin ko.. kasi naman yung "The Secret" na libro na yan .. kainis wala.. I shoudl have not let her read my blog.. kasi balak ko ibigay yung book na "the Missing piEce" nun mansary namin.. I said to myself I bibigay ko yun sa taong talgang na faLL ako.. eh sa blog ko ibigay ko sana kay Jeff .. pero ayaw ko nga ibigay.. kupal yun.. the thing is Ican't find the book and its hard to find that book sobra.. kulang na lang eh mag beg na ko sa mga friends ko sa manila.. hala andami kong di nagagwa ngaun .. di ko na mamail friends ko .. na gusto ko anjan pa rin at nalalaman na Buhay pa ko.. aheheh Ganito PaLa.. pero hindi rin magagawa ko rin yun.

Grabe I love her.. talaga minsan nga gusto ko mag give up.. pero ewan ko ba somethings telling me not to.. I know I'm a shallow person .. pero sabi ko kay Lord if ever he gives me one I'll try my best not to be one..


Heheh .. madami kong gusto ikwento.. nun birthday ko pala .. exam namin sa sales... bagsak ako dun sa subject na yun kainis... 70 lang ako.. si pearl .. sus 82.. the exam was so easy pero kasi preoccupied ata ako nun eh.. I know .. I should have not done this.. pero I've been telling you before na 2 and 7 lucky number ko diba.. so ayun nun 27 na ko something happened before the exams na ang saya saya ko.. kasi la talga akong care nun parang basta iba.. I told her everything na .. some of it wala sa blog ko kasi before 2005 pa.. pero everything na feeling ko big deal.. pero bakit ganun di man naging big deal sa kanya.. saya.. hayy sabi na nga ba eh babaw ko talagang tao. So anyway. to cut the story short at nobela na ito saka na lang ako kwento sa next blog ko.. uhmpp naging kami nun 15 .. after a long time sa wakas naka kiss na rin ako..wahehe.. hmpf.. sana di mabasa nila cris ito tatawanan ako pero okay lang din kwekwento ko rin lang eh .. anyway ang saya ko nun grabe .. sobra.. kaya siguro di rin ako nakakaconctrate sa sales nun kasi sales subject nirereview ko nun eh. Hala maiinis sa kin ng konti friends ko pag nalaman nila ginagawa ko sa school ko .. gumagaya na ata ko kay joana.. (di man siguro).. joana finally decided to enrol her law subjects na kala nun parents niya na natapos na niya kasi graduate na siya. Loko yun papuntahin pa ko sa graduation niya eh di man siya nag graduate parang niloko ko rin mom niya.. pero okay lang din kasi kutuwa yun ginawa niya.. nag drama na nag tatae daw hehe kaya hindi nag march nun day na un... and at least she's trying her best to move on after Res.. saya puro names na ko sa blog ko.. kasi naman sabi ni Joanne bakit hindi daw names .. eh kasi naman puro technical ung mga kawork ko feeling ko binabasa pa rin nila blog ko eh wala na ko dun sa sitel.. malaman pa nila kadramahan ko sa buhay .. haayy

Tulog si Joanne and she knows I'm doing my blog .. sana ako napapanaginipan niya.. kainis kasi eh lagi daw siya nabbangungot feeling ko tuloy ako nga nasa dream niya.. waahh baka nakikita niya scary face ko wahehe.

Bow!

Sorry.....

Sowee. . . . . . . :(
To my family I'm sorry coz I'm failing in School But I'll do my best to get myself back on the right track I'm sorry coz I don't have a job yet the reason is because I want to finish this semester and catch up in school however I guess I really can't catch up anymore To Joanne I'm sorry coz i'm getting you into trouble and I'm letting you absorb my negativity and stress.. (well i'm not letting you absorb it but I know you get affected because of it). iofor making me more stronger. To my sisters coz I don't go home hehe (always overnight, coz I'm trying to review, but i just can't get my focus) To my classmates for not being that responsible unlike before. To my close friends for not always being there but thank you for at least being there for me. To my other friends (not that close).. I told My GG everything. Sorry because I can't really accept something I really didn't do and I'm gonna fight for this in my own way, If you don't believe me that's fine with me I'm willing to risk our friendship since I tried my best to explain my side, I love myself more than I love the friendship we had even now that she help me realize who I really am. I love her so much and I know you want to push me away from her --- that's okay, just keep on doing it because it makes me more stronger and us stronger. (yeah were working on it). pag napuno na ako... makikita niyo.
To myself for most fo the time forgetting what I should do... I'm sorry coz I know this is not me , but in the process I'm starting to know who I really am at least...
To SFC for not winning the competition, believe me ... I really felt bad at that time - missing the most important talks where I know I could feel more stronger..actually made me feel bad And finally to God , I know I lack prayers, I know should have prayed more..

... defending her from my family I guess wouldn't be that hard my dad and mom are open minded and at least I would know what to tell them since they are the ones who really see the efforts I do for myself eversince, kahit pasaway minsan ...but Defending my love to HER friends that would be really tough coz although they are my friends as well still they don't know who i really am... That's just it!

Im Lost

Today we had our 2nd fight actually I think 1st fight... first was when I didn't teLL her about what paulie and I talked about. The reason behind is because the moment Paulie was telling me about what I've been telling her I realized that It would really be hard probably for joanne to keep a secret. Anyway my Gg told me about what actually happened---- I believe her. It's just that I don't know how to start it.. I mean how would I tell her what paulie told me when paulie said not to tell anyone about it. Paulie is my friend ( I guess... until she finds out about Joanne)...


i don't know what I'm going to do with my subjects now. Sometimes Joanne thinks she's the one to be blamed , i don't think she should be blamed for this... When I started dreaming about being a lawyer.. I tried my best to have more passion for my studies.. she was not yet there at that time.. my only motivator was myself and my family.. more on my mom i should say aheheh... and if i'm not doing my best to study not unlike how how I used to study before I cant blame her for that because in the first place sometimes i think most of the time I spend the rest of my day with her. I should really do somthing about this because sometimes I still can't picture myslef studying in UB.. I'm gonna cry I guess the moment that happens. And 2 weeks from now is exam week... I really have to do something abou this.. Just imagine in our one subject (property) which is 4 units.. no one passed in the class the highest was only 73... its really gonna be tough for me to catch up this finals.. God please help me .. geez i always say this everytime i update my blog.

Okay anough of that crap.. tomorrow I'm thinking of going early to the library but I can't because I have with me the money.. I can't bring it there.. Joanne is really so lucky to be given a big blessing.. Most of the time i don't want to be a part of it.. I don't want to her a bout what people will say incase they find out about our plans .. what shes been doing for me for the past few months... You know what I have never felt this way I hate being treated out sometimes.. kasi I don't know I look at it na parang utang na loob... pero she usually says she's just sharing whatever she has.. sometiems I kinda feel bad everytime she says this.. i know i should not feel bad .. i just feel like my life is miserable.. i've been unemployed for almost 2 months and as far as i know I have never felt this way before.. It's like I dont know what my next step is... my next plan... It's alreay Bar ops and I havent called up mayciel yet.. I hope she's doing well .. Oh How i wish i could talk to her tomorrow I'm sure she needs my support.. mayciel I know you can do it...


Oh yeah about last saturday uhmmmp I LOST :( and you know what i did i actually asked my kuya to cut my hair so i could have bangs needless did i know that he would mess it up.. now i dont know what to do with my hair.. i should have not trusted him.. nanette and arra told me he never cuts it perfect... always a 'wreck" i remeber nanette even cried before... anyway i know that my bangs will grow longer in a few weeks time...


You know what i feel today.. I feel that if ever we will break up... it would just be easy fore her to say it.. she is really experienced in this kind of relationship.. i'm not.. im trying my best and i hope she understands ... it's just that with this fight that we had today I feel like .. it would just be easy for her to leave me... Honestly .. i might be devasted in case that happens.. I love her .. I really do.. cris melai and donna even noticed that.. when i was telling them a short story about how we started going out...

from now on i call this blog .. jade.. oh how i wish that she really feels the same way.. i feel like she usually gets irritated .. because im clumsy.. geez i really have to change.. on second thought .. i did change.. yeah i sued to be organized with my time .. pero i dont know i just like it like this... happy everyday im with her....

ok i need to go to bed now .. i told her that i will be leaving the house early... ciao


bye jade .. till then

***hehe finally :(** "what am i gonna do?

A few months from now I see myself enrolling in a different school, as a metter of fact I cant believe something different happened this year that actually changed my life. I'm not working anymore althoguh I really miss working, for me being a fulltime student doesn't make me productive at all, i feel sick, I feel restless although the good things is my breakouts are not unlike before, :)

And..... get ready for this part.. i'm finally in love .. and "in a relationship" ... hehe imagine after almost 10 years .. finally i get to have chance to finally be with someone but the thing is shes a girl... and i don't care. I remember Ryan telling me before that probably the reason why I cant be as happy as I want is because I havent tried falling in love .. like really falling in love.. and I guess did is it.. I'm sure this is it.. I hope so.. I really hope she feels the same way.. because sometimes I'm still worried about whether or not she is really serious about our relationship.. i think she is serious . God please let her stay with me forever

antagal mo ate cahloi!

geeezz I'm actually waiting for a friend .. i wonder why its taking ate carol so long .. kainis talaga.. anyway something nice happened this year. Finally , natry ko na rin mag hotel ahehe.. our friend joan treated us and we stayed at manila heritage for almost 1 day i just can't imagine how expensive it was .. Just imagine almost 17grand for half day.. tuition ko na yun for 1 sem.. anyway I think gusto talaga niya so okay lang yun.. I miss ate jo.. so much .. maybe this is something anyway i shall not yield basta imso glad noone knows about my Blog .. about school just imgaine we had a 1 hour quiz for 12 items that are so difficult,I'm sure you know na verbatim teacher namin.. i really have to catch up this week ..by the way i dont have a job and i dont know what im gonna do.. but i'll be working on it after next week kailangan ko lang muna pumondo,,, i have to .. imean this is not me... i used to budget my time and everything.. about kuya LLoyd ---wala lang --- hahah friends.. di man kasi ako oo dun eh .. feeling ko lang talaga kulang ako ng prayers.. kulang na kulang.. ang tagal talga niya kainis.. ako lang dapat nangaganito eh .. take care.. to tell you honestly ito na yung pinakpasaway ko na month this year... i have to change ... BIG TIME .. before its too late

How and When

Hi there i know its been awhile anyway today is our first day of school , I dont know if im ready to come in to school but i kinda think i am considering the fact that finally i was able to at least lessen my pile of laundry ( i hate it) . Talking about Laundry it's a good thing my mom got roxie and her other cousinto do our laundry everyday saturday. We pay them 400 i think thats too much but then i realized that its okay since they don't have any source of living their both in college and they need money for their allowance, whew just like me i guess. My job is different though .. okay lets talk talk about my job, according to my co worker who also works on a 5 hr shift the management was actually thinking of not regularizing her. Only 3 of us here work on a 5 hr shift and were all Law students. The rest work on a 9 hr shift or sometiomes 11 hr shift, I don't know but i feel that i can't really work on a 8 hr shift since i need to read a lot , see im not smart to be able to absorb everything that i read. Okay anyway im now thinking of finding a different job. I only paid 3 thou for my tuition fee and the thing is I should have 10k plus, I dont really know if I would still be able to study next sem I can't shoulder the expenses any longer and I cant even find someone who could help me out with this. How???

Last friday I went out with my co workers and we went on a picnic, all we did was o talk about our boss who thinks differently I'm so scared I need to keep this job as much as possible I need to find another job that could help with my expenses. Oh Lord please sana maregular ako. Saturday I went out and went to Joan's place I just watched PBB,Ejay won and yeah i like that kid he looks like my cousin Russel (really taLL, what a hunk). Pinoy dream academy's going to start probably next month and i kinda feel bad coz i've been wanting to be a part of it, i just have no time to audition in Manila believe me this part that i'm talking about is really true, Oh how i wish I could still have the chance to be a singer. i feel like i reaally have no shot to be famous. hehe! if someone publishes my blog well i guess that's the only time i'm gonna get famous.
Anyway last sunday I went out with my family and other families.. okay the CFC family. I also enjoyed it however i think the pool was not that okay compared to the pool that we first went to. Highlight of it was we went to the cave again and I had a sauna. Oh how i love that steam cave.
Yesteday was a holiday and cris together with jo, her cousins, jarrel and Rob went to Itogon same place , I wonder why melai was not there anyway, I'm so happy that they really liked the place. I admit I fell inlove with that HoTSpring and I wanna go there again and again.
Yesterday I went out with Andong together with Ivy and Christian (Full time YFC's 'oh how i envy them"). I liked the MOvie it was so fun and watching it just made me realize something. I'll tell you what I realized towards the end of this blog entry.
You know this Guy that i was talking about before I find him crazy .. andong said he's just depressed but anyway i just wonder why he has to tell me that hes here in Baguio tehfact that hes not. Last night I blocked his number in my phone (glad my phone has that kahit parang pangkalso na siya) i'm sure he was trying to call me up. I dont want to talk to him anymore nor do i want to do anything with him. Just a waste of time. Anyway he sent me a text message apologizing , but i never teted back I did have load hehe but i never texted him back I just don't want to talk to him anymore. Geez im fed up of these guys , my mom said that i'm gonna stay and old maid, but i dont care. I guess im gonna die young , and i cant see myself turn 70 or 80 or even 60 without anyone to take care of me.
i hate my sisters specially arra I mean she can't always brag that teh reason why her temper is so short is because she's stressed out. Oh how i miss dana these past few weeks the environment at home became stiff. I miss her soooo much ...
School again.. OMG. Jaja my previous blockmate said that Sec A is a block of smart students My mom said that would really be tough, talking about a break even thing. What does she care she does not support me anyway she shoudl have motivated me or told me something that would make feel like I have to move on. Anyway i forgive her she said she's sick and yesterday she really had a fever , I wonder what arras doing about it. I had to buy 6 biogesics yesterday just to find out that they already bought bogesics for her. C'mon guys im trying to squeeze my money. Hmmm i guess i just have to budget it again. hehe I forgot to pay my dad today, I'll pay him tomorrow.
Okay this is a long blog I could tell anyway I really miss dana my angel. My lovely pretty niece when i was watching Kung-fu panda yesterday i remembered her. Dana talks in her sleep even before she turned 1 year old. Sometimes she says happy, or sometimes you could hear your name being called up, I kept on asking he since then the secret of life thinking that she would answer back but she never answers it. When the panda the got teh scroll he was so excited to know about teh secret kungfu however he saw nothing in the scroll just his reflection. Eventually he realized that there is no secret everything is about you, everything is about believing in yourself and trying to make it special. Then I realized that the reason why Dana was not talking was because the Secret of Life is Nothing!! It's just you....
Peace Ya'll wish me luck again. Oh when!

CUTE.. :)

why??

i was just perky for the past few weeks, I passed :) .. however these past few days i was not feeling okay.
Well as you know i used to help cris troubleshoot her computers and rob as well. Allhe while I thought that i would be able to earn money for that, the thing is im so excited to get back to school. However when cris handed me the money the 3k i thought just became 300.. well you know for me that was okay .. i just needed time on my own that is why i decided not to show up.. man i really felt bad that day she handed me the money.. anyway after that day me , melai and g went out .. well i would say i was really intoxicated .. i don't know well maybe it's just that i wanted to study so much however i can't anymore :( ... now moving on remember i was telling you before about ate carol, the thing is i don't know but i kinda not like the crowd when she's around but she's nice only if its only you and her.. yung dalawa lang talaga kayo.. coz you would really see the real her when you just spend time with her alone.. i wonder why she acts differently when she's in a crowd.. but she's okay.. anyway i don't really like hanging out that much with her because everytime she is around there's always a lot of people around ( i hope you get my point) however yesterday.. just imgaine the least person you know who would help you out helped me out.. yep finally i was able to enrol yesterday .. supposedly block section however i didnt want to because i don't like hanging out with my old block anymore that's the things.. arra said i have issues well i think she does as well..
By the way arra is working now in a construction as a nurse .. and she gets paid big .. imagine her first job.. big pay.. she's getting paid bigger not unlike me. I mean her pay I guess is way back bigger. I just hope that she would spend her money wisely, sana hindi gmaya sa ate. Anyway she's planning on taking her masters next sem.. Go giRL..
yesterday I had a confession just imagine after 2 years ata . nag confess ulet ako .. ehhe. Anyway napasubo ako sa binili ko swear .. kasi uhuhu la na ko pera.. kaya lang kasi ang ganda eh .. :).
I hate Arra if she does the laundry ang baho pa rin kasi, as usual i have to wash it all over again..
Today i will be going straight home ?? why ?? coz i dont want to go to BIR yet.. i don't know i just feel like its a waste of time .. I go there. . they tell me they have not yet recieved my uncle's transfer.. i mean whats the use I just haet it so much .. anyway i just think that i'd better rest. just a few more days and classes will be starting again..

anyway ... i really enjoyed my niece's birthday so much.. she's really the cutest.. i mean shes so cute and energetic. Sometimes I think that im getting my strenght from her and now that she's not around.. i don't know ..i just dont know..
My mom and I stayed long at City hall waiting for my dad to pay his credit card.. when it comes to biLLs ireally hate it.. they just tie you up with shit..
anyway ill be Leaving now.. till next blog!

SOLO MusiKa BAsta Eraserheads aNd Bida !

I want to talk about this;

I was in First year highschool when I first went watching band cocerts actually I was really a ig fan of rivermaya. Just imagine being the first one to enter the Gym, frontseat, with my dad haha.. thats how obsessed I really get sometimes. Yeah I was so young at that time, the hell!! man do i love music, anyway after Rivermaya's concert I then watched Eraserheads' concert here in Baguio I guess that was the second time pa lang na nagconcert sila dito. I gotta tell you It was really the bomb!.

I really miss that band and I'm quite not sure whether a reunion wouLd really happen, well there was a reunion that happened before unfortunately Ely did not show up because he has to go to the doctor,

Everyonme was there including the new singer that was just introduced before the reunion Kris Gorra Dancel. Anyway here are the reponses of each member when they were interviewed. But first!, " a glimpse ":

Eraserhead was derived from the movie eraserhead..

All the band members are from Up dilimaN..

The Eraserheads are one the best-selling musical acts of all time in the Philippines, paving way for an international career that earned them the "Moon Man" in the MTV Video Music Awards. (haha! I watched that before)
The band released more than several different singles, albums, and EPs that reached number one. This commercial success was most evident in the release of their third album Cutterpillow, which achieved platinum status several times.

For the diehard E-heads fan, the news of the bands' break-up was so tragic that there was a significant sense of loss. With all due respect to the fans, it really was such a huge and sad thing. The music of the Eraserheads is so classic in the sense that it reminds us of carefree high school days and of tambayan songs that weren't corny. For now we have Parokya.. I like them but still I wouLd say E-heads is far more the best.


The Reason for the Break Up:

Maybe too much fun. As Raimund Marasigan confessed, "For the past few years, the past few albums—nag-cru-cruising lang kami. Wait for the shows. We rehearse twice a year."


Buddy agreed, "Familiarity breeds contempt. Ano kasi eh, complacency rin…It's bound to happen, we've been doing it for 12 years. So you get used to things...All of a sudden, something happens totally unexpected…ako, di ko na-expect…Shocked ako—what's happening, diba?"


The guys wanted it clear though that "There was no big production when Ely left. Walang sigawan…walang confrontations."

Marcus Adoro summed it up best when he pointed out, "Yung attitude ng banda, sabi ng mga matatanda na, selfish naman kung hanggang matanda na kayo, ganun pa rin."


Influential singer-songwriter Ely Buendia expressed mixed feelings about tributes recently being given to his former band Eraserheads, citing such events as premature especially that he is still active as a recording artist. This he told the Manila Bulletin during a pocket interview to promote his new band Pupil’s debut album.

ELy: "It’s too early to be taking part in it and I don’t see myself being part of it kasi I’m still doing something here," said the 35-year-old hit-maker when asked to react how come he did not attend the reunion concert (featuring current local acts paying tribute to his former group) staged for Eraserheads recently. He even assessed, "To be part of it is like acknowledging na tapos na ako; isa na lang akong trophy na itatago na. Siguro kung uugud-ugud na ako, that’s the time I’m gonna look back." (how sad right.. damn sana naman wag I dont want to headbang na matanda na ko.. wala lang I can seee my self kasi na sobrang ma eexcite pag nag reunion silang lahat)


Budddy - a reunion was not outside the realm of impossibility there wouldbe a time for it, and now was definitely not the time ( oh how i wish that it wont take Long.. Incase they would ever think of putting back the pieces or incase they would ever think of picking up where they left off.. the world would be a better place.. It's just that all their songs where so good a lot where really able to relate to it)


SOLO MusiKa BAsta Eraserheads aNd Bida !


Anyway yesterday I went to school.Bir Is OffLine damn .. my uncles probably mad now me not paying him yet. I'll be working on it don't worry. i dont want want to tak Crim 3 I might fail that subject. I have to take up COnsti 2 first. I don't want to be a block section. I just dont like it. okay well I realized that I would only be able to get like 15 units.. and I would really be having troubles catching up. I guess I really have to admit that ... it's stress time again.. Oh my gosh .. Im feling it again ..


can i just shake my head and walk and walk away? - eheads hangover

sandwhich- BetaMax

What do you guys think? I thought this deserved it's own post since it is an interesting topic.

Oldman said My Chemical Romance glamourised suicide or something like that because of a lyric they have that says 'blade' which apparently means razor blade.

My Chemical Romance aren't exactly one of my favorite bands but I've seen them live and they were pretty awesome. I don't really understand how their music is depressing though as it's incredibly upbeat.

One song I love is an old Ozzy song that caused a huge controversy when it was released - Suicide Solution.

I'm quite positive Ozzy was hoping this would happen. It's great publicity for a band - even though he didn't need any.

Ozzy was taken to court by the parents of a boy who killed himself. The boy had depression but his parents decided it was easier to blame Ozzy.

The song was about alcoholism. "Wine is fine but whiskeys quicker
Suicide is slow with liquor, Take a bottle and drown your sorrows
Then it floods away tomorrows."

The song also featured the lyric: "Where to hide, suicide is the only way out - Dont you know what its really about".

Ozzy didn't write the song but he still got sued twice for it.

Does it glamourise suicide? I listen to the song all the time and never think about suicide. I certainly don't feel suicidal listening to it. Mainly I'm in awe of Randy Rhodes' awesome guitar solo.

Yet when I listen to the Bye bye by Mariah Carey or any depressing song , yeah i feel sad depressed and sorry for myself but then I never think of commiting suicide.

I really have a strong passion for music and everytime I seek out music that suits my mood.

I don't think bands should be blamed for these ones because f we're going to blame bands why don't we blame every band that has a song that makes people cry or feel depressed?


Why do we always have to blame rock bands?
aice 4ever Rocker.. naks

I so fell in love with this song it just simply talks about life before.. i think life before was way far better than now...

kakamiss and eheads!


Betamax -saNdWhich

Wala pa nung myx wala pa nung MTV
Wala pa nung internet
Wala pa nung ipod o mp3
Wala pa nung cable
Wala pa nung cellphone
Wala pa ring cd or dvd
Meron lang betamax

Sa jingle magazine
Natutong mag gitara
Sinifra ang mga kanta
Sa cassettte at plaka

Mula sa himig ni Pepe Smith
Mag blues si Wally Gonzales
Lumaki sa layaw ni Mike Hanopol
Bumalik ang kwago ni Bosyo
Kamusta mula sa Maria Cafra
Umistambay si Heber
Sa bahay ni Gary Granada
Nagbago ang lumad ni Joey Ayala

Nagreklamo si Chikoy Pura
Sa balita ng Asin
Ang anak ni ka Freddie
Kinontra ni Edu Abraham
Dumibidoo ang Apo Hiking
Mga kababayan ni Francis M
Beh buti nga sa Hotdog
Nosibalasi Sampaguita

Wala pa nung MYX wala pa nung MTV
Wala pa nung internet
Wala pa nung ipod at mp3
Wala pa nung cable
Wala pa nung cellphone
Wala pa ring cd or dvd
Meron lang betamax

Sa jingle magazine
Natutong mag gitara
Sinifra ang mga kanta
Sa cassettte at plaka

Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy

Padayon

Baby baby Rico J
Musikahan ni Ryan Ryan
Umiskul bukol kay Tito Vic and Joey
Sumayaw sa VST
Humataw kay Gary V
Bumilad sa ballad ni Martin Nievera
Request sa dj ni Sharon Cuneta
Nangako sayo si Rey Valera
Salamat sa the Dawn
Ang tatay ko, si Jack Sikat
Disyembre ni Binky Lampano
Nangarap ang Identity crisis
Wag kalimutan ang Wuds
Namatay sa ingay ng Dead Ends
Never meant to be Betrayed
Sa XB, NU at Club Dredd

Wala pa nung MYX wala pa nung MTV
Wala pa nung internet
Wala pa nung ipod at mp3
Wala pa nung cable
Wala pa nung cellphone
Wala pa ring cd or dvd
Meron lang betamax

Sa jingle magazine
Natutong mag gitara
Sinifra ang mga kanta
Sa cassettte at plaka

Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy ang daloy ng alon
Ipagpatuloy

Padayon

thursday

Hi again! with what I'm going to write today.. im not sure.. well imnot actually sure of whats going to happen to me now that we actually moved to a different place;our office moved to a different place, it was better though the house was so nice compared with the small space that we used to have. Finally my grandpa came back home with my uncle Ted he's a Cebu born and raised unc.. anyway he really is a chain smoker, yesterday we went to different tourist spots here in Baguio and honestly at first i find it a bore touring people to places that they haven't been to, but then i realized that if you don't focus to much on yourself then you would be able to see the happy faces of those people your touring, I mean common I'm sure you would love to be amazed by places which you haven't been to , or places which are new to you. I admit I'm from Baguio but still I was amazed yesterday bout the places that we went to honestly I've been staying here for 25 years but then still there was these place that i haven't been to, ( maybe I've been there when I was young, It's just that I was not able to appreciate it. Anyway bottom line is I would love to do it again.


Anyway today is payday and as usual money will just slip of my hands Again!.. I still miss those days back when i was a coach ,back when i was a QA.. back when I was an Agent.. back hen I was Tier2.. geez im just starting to realize that I huh! I actually tried all the position in a cellcenter (well almosT).. okay now I work in a call center yup i do the same stuff but I don't consider it that way because I don't take in call but I call up my students...

okay pay is ready geez enrolment again .. i just hate it

♦••♦ I want to be a Christian Singer concert queen ♦••♦
♦••♦waLa pang ganun sa pinas in fairness ♦••♦
♦••♦pero serious ako , u know Hillsong? ♦••♦
♦••♦I Like them .. di ako mag sasawa sa songs nila sa imeem grabe
♦••♦ It's Arra and Lloyd's interview today ♦••♦
♦••♦ Huh for the first time I mentioned a name ♦••♦
♦••♦ Lord my family and my friends are more than enough for me ♦••♦
♦••♦ I feel blessed na rin wiThout someone ♦••♦
♦••♦So bahala na kayo ♦••♦
♦••♦ anyway I hope na makuha si Arra ♦••♦
♦••♦jason got booted out in American Idol :( ♦••♦
♦••♦ I like him but just to be fair syesha, david and archuleta ♦••♦
♦••♦ are far more better than him ♦••♦
♦••♦ Anyway im sure he will shine, i'm sure he will be famous♦••♦
♦••♦Yesterday i had to help Rob type the agreement form it was just 18 pages though but i had to go home late :( ♦••♦
♦••♦ anyway extra cash, extra income♦••♦
♦••♦ Thazz okei! ♦••♦
♦••♦ I have an enemy in friendster ♦••♦
♦••♦ its Buddha's birthday on Monday♦••♦
♦••♦ share ko lang.. heheh .. i remember a book i read before ♦••♦
♦••♦ a Buddhist book.. say Amithaba 10 times in the morning ♦••♦
♦••♦ 10 times in the evening , its what some monks do ♦••♦
♦••♦ to attain happiness ♦••♦
♦••♦ i haven't tried it yet ♦••♦
♦••♦ But I might haha! ♦••♦
♦••♦ c'mon did I not tell you it has been my dream to talk to a monk ♦••♦
♦••♦ I find them full of wisdom ♦••♦
♦••♦ Oh yeah and one more thing , theres thing one thing I want to achieve ♦••♦
♦••♦ or at least happen .. and that is ♦••♦
♦••♦ to worship to God with my GG ♦••♦
♦••♦ seriously , i hope this would happen ♦••♦
♦••♦ Bye for now ♦••♦


♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦ ♦••♦

♦☆♦ YesTerDaY because of the HousehOLd ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I accidentally got wounded ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ AccidentaLLy got wounded because of the glasses♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I Love syesha's performance last night ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ i fell in Love with the SOng ♦☆♦



♦☆♦ I have to finish 5 books before school starts ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Oh damn i feel so sleepy today ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I 'm Late again for the 10 min ruLe ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I hate That Rule ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I"A Change Is Gonna Come,"is a song sang by Sam Cook ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ On December 11th, 1964, nearly a year after he recorded the song ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Cooke was fatally shot at a Los Angeles motel. ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Two weeks later, "A Change Is Gonna Come" was released ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ as a single -- Cooke's farewell address and final hit. ♦☆♦

♦☆♦My bet here is David Cook but Syesha's a big competition ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ and her performance last night was the best performance she had ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I didn't like her that much .. until last night ♦☆♦


♦☆♦ He called up again ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I wonder why i was smiling when he called up ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ OMG ate Dev's puto was the best ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ the visitors actually liked it and asked me to doggy bag it ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ anyway ye for now ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ geez once again .. I need Money ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ I almost got late again because of my dad ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ He should have told me that na wala pala yung Van ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Then I should have left earlier , really earlier ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Cris will be going to Hongkong on Saturday ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Im so happy for her ♦☆♦
♦☆♦ Geez bye now ♦☆♦

♦•••♦ I didn't know it would show this way. Sorry just tilt yer head soyou could have a better view anyway these are pics I got from Karen's friendster. (we are not close though ) i find her okay but feel like she find me not okay anyway I don't give a damn ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ This is mark and janet, mark is my 2nd cousin ♦•••♦

♦•••♦ Im the last one, the gown was not okay , i didn't like the color of my gown plus I was not comfortable with my shoes at that time, I bought a new shoes that same day but since I was so in a hurry I wasn't able to fit it well ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Me again with the other bridesmaid I guess i really gained weight ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ another style which i Find korny ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ me again ..
♦•••♦ My moms' the one with a curly hair .. left end .. white gown ( she loves wearing this)♦•••♦
♦•••♦ yep You may Kiss the bride ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ My pretty cus , the grooms youngest sister ,isn't she the prettiest , her names angie ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ when will I get to have my kiss the groom moment, on second thought it's kiss the bride moment.. maybe i just feel so desperate ♦•••♦


♦•••♦after the wedding someone texted me thanking us for helping in the wedding, well all i can remember during the wedding was after eating i went straight to my grandma's house just near the reception area , to sleep yep i helped but not that much .. anyway when i get married im not gonna expect to much from my bridesmaid of course they need to help but when it comes to serving food etc im gonna leave it all to the caterer ♦•••♦

♦•••♦ these people expected us brides maid to work and do the work .. i just hated that ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ i'm sorry but i know i was wrong and all not being there to help a lot .. maybe because i was just feeling so tired ♦•••♦

♦•••♦ ciao for now ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Oh I miss .. uhmm i dunno ♦•••♦

♦•••♦ He did not caLL me up yesterday, ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ i kinda got used to him calling me up every night ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I hope its already goodbye ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I don't want to fall ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Today there's a Household at home..meaning .. ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ i have to go stRaight Home . I think I need to look ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ for a new job again. I'm always Late and I was Late ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ again this morning , well I did told my dad that the ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ only thing that could wake me up is his cellphone ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ funny hehe ! ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ But its true.. Ihope this sunday I would be able to attend♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Clp.. Last suNday I met with Andrea and we had FUN ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ We had to waut for his boyfriend ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ to come up here in Baguio, That is why I was hanging ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ out with her until 11:30 PM. I dunno but I guess ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ i'm not used to that time anymore ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I would like to go back to the hotspring weve been to ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I wich that we could go back there before school starts♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I think I'm sick .. Lord please I need good health ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ in order to achieve my goal , Please bless me with one ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Today I hope would be an okay day ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I have to finish 4 books before school starts ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ and my Catcher in the Rye book is missing :( ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ By the River Piedra I sat Down and Wept was ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ the last book Iread and I find it a nice Book ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I can see myself as Pilar ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Sometimes I feel like I should really talk to the other ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ That book made me think that everything is possible ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ With Love .. Damn can't just see myself ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ besides why should I think about that when ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ there are lots of things that I need to focus on ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ FiRst ..My job ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I hate to say this but if ever im the boss im gonna ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ kick out an employee who's just like me ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ back when i was a supervisor I was kinda strict with ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ attendance, I remember I terminated 2 agents ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ because of attendance, but i made it easy ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ huhu.. just a few more months and i'll be turning 27 ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ my lucky number ... hmmm now whats gonna happen ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ to me again. ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I've had this blog for years now I guess years ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ and i feel like lyf has not been easy for me back then ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ Ow yesterday i just found out that the last day ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ of filing for real estate exam was last may 2 ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I got pissed of becasue these actually ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ means that I would haver to take ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ the exam on November , I hate the delay ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ why have i not been aware of the filing thing ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ anyway they changed something and according ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ to them before a person would be ataking the exam ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ he/she would need to attend the seminar ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ the seminar believe me is worth 4k ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ pakxet.. na Lang ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ I miss going out .. vacation is almost over ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ and I havent had enough fun yet ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ i guess the reason behind that is because ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ of financial shit ! ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ oh I guess i need to cut down my cus words ♦•••♦
♦•••♦ anyway bye for now Beau Adieu !! ♦•••♦

Things had been going okay since the last day of class though i was having financial problems still i was able to carry on. I realized I was getting by.Cris' business have already started, I havent taken yet the real estate exam but something good just happeneda today I passed our 5 units subject and finaly I passed all the subjects, well I have not yet seen my grade in Consti. ( the subject i failed last sem) but the thing is i have a strong feeling that i passed that subjects. Sleepless nights,pimples, missed gimmicks and family gatherings, things I have to give up for the mean time just to be able to find time to hang out all day in SLU lib , City Lb and UC lib. Oh yeah just last tuesday I saw my favorite librarian quit her job to work at Mcdonalds I was trying to tell her not to continue with that job because it's better to be employed by the school talk about free tuition fee.. but anyway i should not care about because I'm not sure about the things that made her exchange her job for that Job.
I hate our new Korean Manager I don't actually hate him but i just hate the way he tries to lay around the rules. We have this 10 minute rule that I have to be in the office 10 mins before my shift and if im not there... I'm late.. and i need to suffer by signing a memorandum or by submitting a letter of explanation ( so absurd). Just imagine i have to drag myself up to bed to wake up at 3:30 am . How am i gonna cope up once school starts again. Geez this would really tough.
We had a new househelper who's sick as in literally sick once again I lost the last keds I bought from the last pay I had when i was with Clientlogic/ Sitel. Mahilig pala ang chimi-a-a sa keds bad trip!.
Dana's getting prettier and healthier our Little angel. Theres one thing im so concerned about, I've been suffering from cough and colds for almost a month now and supposedly I should be going to a doctor today but i just stayed here in Cris' office. Lord please wg naman sana Tb .. hehehe!
My friend failed the bar exam but she got married anyway last month I actually attended 3 weedings, first was Jasmin's wedding hehe I was an usherette in her wedding and i was supposed to sing however due to i-don't-know-what-happened-which-made-her-change-her-mind, I just sang one song during the picture taking It was an okay song though, a song entitled Look into the Eyes of Love , second was Kuya Felix's cousins wedding ( which made ate dev a maid of honor and Arra aas a instant Bridesmaid, I was the wedding singer) and lastly was my 2nd cousin's wedding I was the brides maid and the wedding singer again (not actually), this coming August i will be singing in Lovely's wedding can't wait.
Just yesterday we went to 1300 damn I love that place I should go there often, I fell inlovbe with the sulfur-cave which i call sauna cave hahah!.. I was so happy to see my family having fun on that outing. I have to post pictures for my Auntie Auring and Cousin's in Friendster.
I wanna be a photographer. i guesss im good in taking pictures teehee!..
Oh yah before I forget there's this guy who's also an SFC he is Andrea's boyfriends' friend. Anyway he is also YFC member and hes okay I guess but I kinda find him uhmm informal. As of now I can't see myself having a relationship with him. He calls me up everyday and hes well OKAY.. except the fact that he posted my sister's picture on his friendster instead of mine.. grrr... anyway yeah i admit it she looks far more prettier than me. uhmm but i'm more sexier. well bottom line is he's okay. Okay i'm trying to change and im lowering my standards now coz i remember i'm not getting any younger and just a few months from now I'll be turning 27... (mah Favorite number).. 2007 was far better than 2008 .. last 2007 I was promoted twice and now that im turning 27... hmmmm wats gonna happen ?? well i'll just leave it to my favorite numbers heheh 2 and 7.
Oh hey congratulate my sister coz she passed and finally she's a nurse hmm I guess i said that before (im just not sure) . Okay another story about her.. finally she now has a boyfriend well her Boyfriend was an old friend and honestly as of now i don't like the idea of her having a boyfriend because c'mon she has to concentrate and help my mom and dad, can't she see what i've been doing for my them before. I know that now i can't give them the support i used to give before but i'm trying my best in school and hayy i passed all subjects even the most challenging subject I had because of the most challenging prof in our college. hmmm just watch me.. and ARRA please think twice, well maybe it's me who's just selfish but anyway just as what my friend joan said ... "aice give her a chance to prove herself, to show to you all that even though she's in a relationship she wont forget her family"... one second thought maybe i'm thinking too much , she's not getting married i know but what i'm concerned about maybe is , what if she does get married and what if she just ends up just like my brother im not saying that I hate what my brother did , I love michelle and dana but he was suppose to help my dad and my mom. Am i expexting too much??
Okay.. tomorrow i will be meeting up with my classmates dada, jaja and mayo .. it's her birthday and i havent tried hanging out with a different crwod for awhile. I know i wont be able to enjoy the party because of my cough and colds but I just want to enjoy vacation.
Oh by the way my pimples are now disappearing heheh FuNNy!! .. thanks to my mom.. and her cash .. I love you so mUch mommy and of course mydad as well just imagine he gets up at 4am as well just to drop me off work "super dad". I have to pay him though but hey that's okay way better than ok,, the thing is im safe and because of that he exercises everyday after leaving the van. i kinda feel bad about this because my mom has to ride a jeep or get a cab everyday to go work, instead of using the van.
okay i guess i talk to much ...
:( Prison Breaks season 3 is still not available, it is available but it doesnt have the complete episode.
My cellphone's stressing me out. If only I have enough money to buy a new phone well I will buy a new one. oh damn do i hate processing my uncles BIR and bus permit. Bus permit is okay now however the BIR thing has not yet been processed i kinda feel lazy doing those stuff. Oh i remember i have to fix jasmin's books and give it back on MOnday it was suppose to be given back to her this week .. unfortunately - i was so busy.
There's this movie I want to watch the title is August Rush it's still not available but i hope soon it will.. sana before pasukan.
May was considered in our company she's my new co -worker started on may 10 i'm so excited. okay i guess I talk to much .. till next blog

Finally , school days over, just imagine i've been spending almost all of my time in the library memorizing articles, reading cases, and reading books that are related to the articles discussed which i think could help ( i hope so ).. well anyway our exam week was really hell for me. Lord knows i really did my best to study. However i know that there still are lots of reasons that i would fail the subjects. I finally then realized that maybe being lawyer is really not for me maybe it will just be a part of the dream that i used to have. Im scared to start from scratch again, im not sure what i would really want to do incase i dont continue my frustration. I sometimes wonder that maybe Veronika in Paolo Coehlo's felt the same way as well. To tell you frankly i actually have a perfect family, well almost perfect. My mom and dad are both leaders in Couples for Christ. My brother which is the smart one in the family, finally found his path to being a family man and im telling you hes actually doing a job on it. My sister who works in a bank is happy with her proffession as fr as i know she is . My other sister who just passed the nursing board exam is happy as well now all she have to do is to think about plan B. ANd my niece Dana.. the angel in our family. Michelle , my brothers' wife is happy working in a bank. Lord at this point , i really want to cry, i'm really giving up na ata. This blog that i have is full of frustrations, depressions lahat na ata.

i do have my friends who help me get through everything, but sometimes they contribute to my depression. I actually have a friend who keeps on telling me that i will be graduating from law school after 10 years (which could be possible incase i dont have money na talaga).
Lord if this is really not for me, im asking you to at least send me someone who will help me accept it.

Just today i heard from my classmate that 18 students failed in our obligations and contracts subject. Supposedly today i would find myself with my friends drinking and having fun. But I can't. Parang at some other point na guilty ako, kasi dapat ngayon nag prapray ako i believe na khit nalagay na grade ko dun pwede pa ring mabago yun. Miracles do happen.So i decided to just go home na lang and spend holyweek with my family, after all they are the reason why im really working hard for my studies although alam ko na minsan eh gastusera talaga ako. Last year was really hell for me. Start pa lang ng year masama na feeling ko. How would i be able to make the best of this year.
I just read Paolo Coehlo's book and there was a certain part of it that really struck me. That the moment a person knows that she has only few days on earth that death will just be around the corner to fuck her life up, that's the time a person would really value and see what life is all about. Live Love Laugh! my motto in life...I don't know what im gonna do without studying. Parang i already got used to it na. Lord please help me .

I love this song.. i really enjoy listening to Second Hand Serenade.. watch as they serenade you with VuLnerable.

Im losing enthusiasm with everything that im doing~ anyway i actually posted here in my blog pics that i cant actually post in friendster tehee!.. im financially drowning .. i really need to find a better job that could pay me higher. I cant live with just 6 thou a month . I can't hold on any longer. I was agiven more students but the thing is its still not enough .. i still need more .. if only they could give me 22 or 27 (hehe fave numbers eh ) then okay na ko swear. Im not going to demand for anything more bigger.
This wednesday we are going to have a very long quiz in oblicon . Imagine I need to digest the book again. Atty Vergara is really plucking our last string of patience but that's okay. sabi nga nila magandang training ground daw ang ginagawa ng mga prof sa UC. The thing is its really stressing us out. Anyway i'm sure that if I do my part HE wont forget to help me out. tehhee! which reminds me .. i need to buy memoplus again or glutafose.. hay naku , up until now i still cant feel the effect of these multivitamins .. all i know is that i feel more sleepy, haha! specially if i take them now most probably i might just stay in bed all day. #3 days na sipon at headache ko kainis. I'm thinking of sending my faborite student in RSVP an email. Hes name is Mr Baek Seung Kyu .. i miss talking to him .. sobra talagang bait nya, the thing is i actually signed something before i resigned that i should not cut my connection or every dealing i have the moment i leave the company. But i dont care! one of these days mag sesend talaga ako ng email sa kanya.
I hope to get rid of my headache and colds. I need to read a lot of things. Just imagine its consti tomorrow, i havent read the cases yet for our next topic which is on executive dept. And on Thursday we will have our long quiz in oblicon .. just imagine you need to memorize 146 articles. Ah basta kakabisaduhin ko lang keber ko .. wala naman .siguro abnormal na lang talaga un makakamemorize nun ng 1 week lang. Eh iisa lang nga ang memeorize ko na kwento galing sa bible eh. And it took me months to memorize it and just think about it 7 mins lang tapos na siya.. ganun ako ka talino.. kidding .. hehe
Today is pay day but its still is useless. I need to pay my mom, my credit card and i need to bye a blue sandal hehe!.. sana kasya. There's this skirt i have that i really would like to pair with my black skinny only i dont have a cute sandals to pair it with. . . sana makha ako sa people support. I really want to get paid higher. kahit mag work na ko ng 8 hrs okay lang sa kin. I'm going to go back to being a coach, or ill just apply as a trainer (Lord please Forbid). I really need to pay my mom the money i owe her. The money i used for my tuition fee , and the money i used to buy my own cellphone.
One more class and im out. I'm actually thinking of going straight to the lib. But i remember i need to take care of dana. I magine until now there still is no baby sitter. The last time i told my sister-in-law that i cant take care of her. I flunked my quiz. kaya ayoko na. I think i'll just take care of dana tapos i'll just review while taking care of her.
byeah! I'll tell you about Paulo Coehlo naman next blog!

Pictures that i need to keep .. so i'll just post it here .. tehee!

ARRA , NANETTE, and ME
(( To My sisters ::Lav YaH ))

3 more minutes and i need to log out here at work ... Finally!

I was just visiting websites about Noel Malimban UC's bartopnotcher and well i kinda wish i could be like him. Libre lang nga talagang mangarap pero siyempre ksabay ng pangangarap eh dapat diba sabayan mo ng pagdadasal at sipag naks!.

I'm really thinking of resigning again. I know I havent stayed here yet for 2 mos, The thing is i know sooner or later i would really have a few students and if i only have a few students then i wont be able to get a bigger pay. We just had 3 days vacation because of Chinese New Year!. I know my job is so easy ... but believe me its really hard to get up every morning at 4:30. Sometimes i use 3 cellphones for my alarm clock, because i have this "5 minutes more" sickness, that i add 5 more minutes to my sleeping time before i actually drag myself to get up ( sometimes my five minutes becomes 10 or 20 mins ... worst was 2 hrs! and yep i almost got fired) anyways.. I dont know if i will still continue my studies next sem. I know University of Cordilleras i one of the best Law Schools here in the Philippines. But sometimes i feel that I should be earning more money not for myself but for my family. Just like old days, I used to give them almost like 6 thou a month , i know thats not big enough considering the fact that i get 22k a month (BEfore!... oh i miss those days). Anyway the thing is sometimes i feel like i maybe the reason im studying again is because i just want to escape from my responsibility. Though some of my friends say that its not actually my responsibility to give them money , I actually attempted not to give them money before ... but i cant.. konsensya ko pa rin un nag sasabi na ang selfish ko naman. Kaya lang nag tataka lang ako sa mommy ko minsan kasi she tells me na di daw ako nagbibigay. Eh from what i remembered before i go shopping for what i want , i make sure na natabi ko na un pera na bibigay ko sa kanila. Siguro ulyanin lang siya.

On feb 22 i'll be applying again in a callcenter. I think I told you before that never am i gonna back to being a callcenter employee. But becasue i need money for my studies and i need to help my parents with the bills and yeah ... my Citibank bill. I need to go back and work again in a callcenter.

I really miss my college days, Ang hirap pala ng graduate school. Especially Law School. Actually last night I was going through my exams during my First semester in Law School i found out that my answers before where actually better than my answers today. Last sem talaga di ako nag concentrate eh . I still cant believe na sumabit un isang subject ko . Di ako yun . Sometimes i hate showing my face in class (the hell do i care) they are not the ones paying for my tuition fee anyway. teehee!

I envy Cris.. well kinda.. but im really happy for her.. she finally found what she want. I just hope that Rob and Cris will learn to settle their differences maturely. Sometimes I think that Rob is acting as if he is younger than cris. Cris never goes out the house , seldom do we see each other. But still he accuses her of something so absurd. I know one of these days he will realize hes wrong.

Sometiems i hate my sister. Especially when she sees me reviewing . Its as if shes telling me that no matter what i do I cant pass my subjects. The reason im actually studying is not because i want people to see me as a smart person , nor for people to see me that my life is productive, not even because i want to show people that I can make sense. But because I want to be a Lawyer, I want to do this for my dream and my family. It was my mom who told me that when my uncle died justice was not served, they were not even able to find the person who murdered him, my uncle was a taxi driver, and at that time i thought that maybe i could find the answer to it. which i know is impossible. kasi matagal na yun wh. Anyway I need to answer a question that has been buggling my mind these past few years that lead me to pursue my dream. How can music lead you to success?, the thing is i really have a strong passion for music and i really wanted to be a singer when i was a kid (not granted). What i noticed was most people who succeeded in their llives where at first musicians. A 3 year old kid i watched in Tv knows how to play a certain piece in his little piano , Most of the attorneys in our school are into music , well i know most people are. Anyway all i wannna know is how could a person be successfull with just music. I hope you get the gist of it.. geez im confused now.

Okay i gotta go now.. take care! and see you soon

hmm wich me luck on Feb 22.. 25 rather!